Emotional Programming

Some people believe that we are all emotionally programmed by our family of origin. Consider the following examples. Syncing Up With Mom Lucy and Paul both want to sync up with their mom at the same time. When babies are young, they try to “get inside their parent’s heads” to understand how life on earth works. As they mature, Christians become less dependent on their family of origin and more on their relationship with God. Two Scenarios  Imagine a baby born into an anxious family where the parents react with fear to many situations. They pass their anxiety on to their child.Now, consider another child raised by parents who ooze love, confidence, and faith in God that everything will turn out well.These two children will approach life differently when they leave home at 18 to find their paths. Which one would you rather have for a boss?Which one would you rather have for an employee?Which one would you rather be? We cannot change our past,But we can work on our issues,And we can positively influence everyone God puts in our lives. Understanding this fundamental concept helps us show empathy when others behave erratically.They are battling unseen struggles.Our duty is clear: Love God with all your heart and your neighbor as yourself—all of our hearts and all our neighbors. How Does This Work? What is Happening? Ezra (Rachelle’s baby, Ross and Karin’s grandson) and Lucy and Paul This photo reminds me of how we are born into bodies and how our tasks in life are: a) To learn how to treat ourselves and b) To learn how to treat those around us. The apostle Paul struggled with these challenges well into adulthood. He found that connecting to God with all his heart was the crucial first step.  “What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death? Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord!” (Romans 7:24-25). These two ideas are critically critical biblical themes, and our choices have eternal significance. Thoughts?

Favorite Photos

The Chief of the Small Lizards in our front yard in Brazil lost his prestigious brown and striped suit. Now he is a vulnerable blue for awhile, easily visible to the Peregrine falcons that also share his space. The trees in our yard in Brazil are full of songbirds. God created melodic songbirds and cool lizards partly so that we could learn more about His creative, lavish nature.  “For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse” (Romans 1:20). We arrived back in Abbotsford, BC, Canada a few hours ago, a) to welcome our third grandchild to the family, b) to spend time with the twins, c) to spend Christmas with family, and d) to have as many coffees and meals with our support team as possible. We’re here until mid-January 2025.

Rick, Careca, and Clenildo (2024) Careca lived in the bush and hated Christians. One day, Clenildo was passing through that remote region and noticed a man working in his field, making farinha, by himself. He stopped and asked if he could help, as it was a two-person job. Careca accepted and later invited Clenildo to his house. When his brothers saw who it was, they asked Careca why he invited a pastor to his home. “No. I would never invite a pastor!” They became friends, though, and Careca and his family became Christians and built a church in Água Preta, next to their house. Careca (2004) Ross Hansen with his float plane in Altamira around 1999. The story, however, started a few years earlier. Ross, my brother-in-law, and I worked on a newsletter in my office in the late 1990s. It was Saturday morning. Jefferson and Vagner, two Brazilian teenagers, came to our house to ask if we could rescue their mom with our truck. She lived many hours away in the jungle, and her hip went out. Back to Careca’s story, Ross took the young men out in his floatplane on Saturday in 1998. The people in Água Preta had never seen a floatplane. Ross overheard men talking on the shore that maybe the president of Brazil was coming to visit them. The young men went up the trail 3 km to bring Vagner’s mom back to the airplane in a stretcher while Ross adjusted the inside of his plane to accommodate it. When Lourdes, the mom, saw Ross and the plane, her eyes widened. “I had a dream last night. A speedboat came zooming up to this shore, and I heard a voice behind the boat say, ‘You can only be healed by the God of the Bible.'” You are that speedboat. Lourdes is Careca’s brother’s wife. The gospel often flows in remote regions through families. This story encouraged us to reach beyond the people we knew to plant churches in faraway places where God was preparing people for the gospel. Careca mostly lives alone now. His daughter, in the picture behind us, works for the government in Vitória, a small city about two hours away. His wife and granddaughter are in Belem because his granddaughter has leukemia. Clenildo has been to visit them in Belem. Careca shared a meal with us during the men’s retreat. Valdinho, in the red shirt, was a young teenager and a zealous young Christian who I met on my first survey trip to the Xingu Region in 1994. Valdinho’s first wife died of cancer while they were pastors at the church in Vitória, the regional center of this area.  Update The Agua Preta church is inactive at the moment. Most of the original members moved on. And Lourdes now lives in Vitória. I haven’t seen her in many years. But the gospel continues to spread. The early adopters make it attractive to many others. In our experience, it takes time for the gospel to penetrate a culture. Just as God works with us over a long period, in the same way, He works with remote people, giving them do-overs and working with them through the consequences of their choices, just like with us. In my experience, the best way to sustainably help the poor is by developing spiritually healthy disciples who form spiritually healthy, welcoming, reproducing communities.

Missionary Support Teams

Early Years In 1992, it took us one year to raise enough monthly support to move to Brazil as long-term missionaries. We had about 2/3 of what Luke Huber said was the minimum, and we were full of zeal and faith. Finally, in October the mission leader, Luke Huber, said,  “Come with what you have, and it will all work out.” Sure enough, it has always worked out. We have often been very low, but it has always worked out. I wish I knew how to express my gratitude more to our support team. I trust God is revealing His appreciation to each person who has participated in helping reach the Xingu River people with the gospel.  A Training Season I clearly remember telling people before we moved to Brazil in 1993, “We are going to the Amazon to learn to plant churches in the tropics in Portuguese. The next 30 years may all be like a dress rehearsal or practice, and our real mission may begin later in life, as it did with Moses on the back side of the desert.”  The Best Season is Still Coming A friend, Art Rae, sent me a quote this week. While our bodies are less resilient, we feel more equipped spiritually and mentally than ever. Deanna and I feel the best use of our combined experience and formal training is to do conferences and spend personal time with leaders, teaching them skills, helping them overcome challenges, and cheering them on in the faith.  We work primarily in more-populated centers, as did Apostle Paul in the New Testament, hoping each city center will populate its backyard. A strategy for how Brazilian missionaries can sustainably, from within their resources, maintain a healthy church-planting outreach remains elusive. Developing spiritually healthy leaders is a good place to start.  So far, our Plans for 2025 include: * most of our time will involve conferences and training in the Xingu / Amazon Region * a global missions conference in Texas * a survey trip to Portugal as a possible mission field for Brazilians Consider the size of Altamira, one of many cities in the Amazon Basin.  Partners Most of our monthly donations come from private donors or partners who support us through Xtreme Mercy Canada (XMC), International Christian Mission Service (ICMS for US donors), and City Life Church (CLC). You can click the links at the bottom of this email to learn more. Over the years, many of our support team members are now retired or are cheering us on from the other side. Coupled with this are the rising costs of travel and ministry. Please pray about giving monthly support to us or other missionaries you trust. Sincerely, Rick Bergen.

Twenty Areas of Growth in Thirty Years

Marabá

It was important for Deanna to come to Marabá, For the church conference, And for these children, Many of whom consider her like a grandma.

Favorite Photos

The mission fleet on the shores of the Xingu River at a Training Camp near Porto de Moz in 2004. Those were good years when Ross and I worked together in Brazil. We were friends in Texas at Bible School. Then, I married his sister, Deanna. Ross and Karin moved to Brazil to work with us at church planting for 14 years. Now, we drink coffee together early on Sunday mornings when I am in Chilliwack. Careca’s backyard and shower house. A flower on the edge of the jungle at Careca’s house. We helped Clenildo and Angelita eat half of a 40-pound watermelon when we were together in Belem. “Thank you” to everyone who has ever helped spread the gospel to remote locations.

Two church planters and senior pastors from different denominations in Marabá use the Mission property for Encontro and training events. Artur, on my left, I met through a guard from the prison who was a member of his church. Artur introduced me to others.

Lara, who lives downstairs in our house, has pet chickens.

Our friends love the swing in the jaca tree in front of our house.

Lucy catches her mom’s eyes as she is still nonjudgmentally gathering data. “How do we feel about this?”

We have known these youth leaders from the Marabá Church for most of their lives. They are courageously pioneering healthier family traditions for their children and grandchildren.

What would you do to help other children grow up with parents who love God and who are working on their stuff? This is the path to community transformation.

Lucy looks into Tim’s eyes to find answers. “How are we doing?” “How do we feel about this?” “How do we respond to situations like this?”

Paul and Lucy are amazingly nonjudgmental and nonreactive at this stage of their lives. They take their cues from their parents and those who care for them. They are gathering data about how things work on Earth. 

Paul is still deciding if he wants to be a shepherd, which is scary. At the same time, his parents are happy, so it must be okay. Lucy is letting the situation play out more before forming an opinion.

Different, AND the Same. / Individuals AND Wearing the Team Shirt.

Paul and Lucy are taking in data and programming their brains to respond to situations later in life.

• What if you could increase your sense of peace and well-being while you eat meals with your family?
• What if you could significantly increase your capacity to appreciate life and people?
• What if you could have such a profound joy that no one had the power to take it away?
• What if the path to joy was walking through the situation you fear?

Jesus offers this benefit to disciples, though the path is fraught with smoke and mirrors because reality is often different than our perception.

Through Sorrow to Joy

“So you have sorrow now, but I will see you again; then you will rejoice, and no one can rob you of that joy” (NLT, John 6:22).

Thriving on the Other Side of Scary

When you perceive everything is going wrong, this may be a clear invitation from God to get involved in organizational change. God wants to lead us out of an old system where we did not thrive through the wilderness to bring us to an unimaginably better place. It has to do with escaping from being a victim of other’s power-over to a place where no one can take your joy, even in this present life. While we may prefer choosing a shortcut to personal comfort, stories about the Exodus, Jesus, and the early disciples all describe a different path.

“’Yes,’ Jesus replied, ‘and I assure you that everyone who has given up house or wife or brothers or parents or children, for the sake of the Kingdom of God, will be repaid many times over in this life, and will have eternal life in the world to come’” (Lk 18:29-30).

(1) Very Good to (2) Not Good, to (3) Resolution

In Genesis 1, God created man, male and female. It was very good. But then, in Genesis 2, He saw they needed a helper. Existing created beings like the animals and the being in one of the two great trees were unsuitable helpers. God chose a new way, to split humans into two opposites, making a bigger whole.

“So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them… it was very good.” (Genesis 1:27-31a).

“Then the LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him” (Genesis 2:18).

Understanding God’s delight when opposites attract and learn to work things out highlights the possibilities available for couples who work through their differences to reach synergy, when the two together become much greater than the sum of two individuals.

The Upside-down Kingdom

True to the counter-intuitive nature of the Kingdom of God, complicated relationships may be God’s invitation to stay. In contrast, exceptionally good relationships may result in an invitation to leave to help a different people group.

Consider my two Bible readings this morning. First, in Tim Mackie’s Classroom, we studied how Rebekah left when no one wanted her to leave.

“’But we want Rebekah to stay with us at least ten days,’ her brother and mother said. ‘Then she can go.’.. “So they called Rebekah. ‘Are you willing to go with this man?’ they asked her. And she replied, ‘Yes, I will go.’ (NLT, Gen 24:58).

Then, in our family Bible.com group, we studied how Jesus stayed with His people, even though He knew He would be crucified. He saw that this was the way toward unstoppable joy.

Bible heroes frequently left places of comfort or willingly embraced awkward relationships to gain invincible joy.

Our Joy We Retain

(Rick Bergen, with help from Copilot)

Change brings discomfort,
It’s true for us all,
And those we engage with,
May stumble or fall.

Our passion is love,
With hearts open wide,
Without losing ourselves,
In the ebbing tide.

Mature servant leaders,
Embrace conflict and scorn,
Seeing the future,
For which they were born.

They savor the journey,
With hope in their eyes,
As they eagerly await,
The coming surprise.

By not giving to others,
The power to cause pain.
They live untriggered lives,
Their joy they retain. 

Your experiences or thoughts?