But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for God’s own possession, so that you may proclaim the excellencies of Him who has called you out of darkness into His marvellous light; for you once were not a people, but now you are the people of God; you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy (1 Peter 2:9-10).
As we are ambassadors for Christ, advancing God’s Kingdom worldwide, how do we influence others?
And how do those around us experience our influence?
Personal and Positional Power
Yukl and Gardner (2020) described the kinds of power people exert over others.
- Legitimate Power – When a person is assigned positional, formal authority.
- Reward Power – When a person can provide something that others want.
- Coercive Power – When a leader can punish someone, possibly by withholding a blessing.
- Referent Power – When people really admire and want to identify with a leader.
- Expert Power – Gained by natural gifting, life experience, wisdom, and knowledge.
Jesus uses all these kinds of power in the last chapter in the Bible, in Revelation 22.
- He is seated at the right hand of God.
- He offers tickets to get through the gate and into the heavenly city.
- He explains the punishment for not taking His offer.
- He is a beloved King, and the more people know Him, the more they will do anything to identify with Him.
- And Jesus is the all-time expert, the creator of everything.
The problem comes in when people use power at the wrong time, or in the wrong way.
Maturity vs. Immaturity
But Jesus called them to him and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. It shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be your slave, even as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many” (Matthew 20:25-28).
Practically Speaking
Everyone is in some position of influence in their circles of family and friends. Many people have influence over small children, elderly parents, or both. How do we best influence people who are really different from us?
My brother is two years younger than me, and my sister is seven years younger than me. While I lived at home as a child, I related more to my brother. As a young adult, I worked on construction and road crews in Northern Canada when I left home. I was comfortable in the rough, mostly male camps. Then God gave me a wife and four daughters. It was a whole new world. Dr. Tim Kubacki, who is now a missionary in Angola, gave me some good advice. “Regularly go out for breakfast or ice cream with each daughter individually. Develop a personal friendship with each child.”
“What would we talk about?”
Tim taught me a power question.
“I’ve never been a 14-year-old girl. What is it like?”
Then let silence do its work. When the pressure is high enough, the other person will talk.
You may adapt Tim’s question for elderly parents, strangers at the bus depot, or even your pastor if you sense they need a friend and might consider you a peer.
Many people do not like talking with others who are different than them because they don’t know what to say.
Use the question. “I’ve never been . . . What is it like?” Or, “What is going on in your world?” The idea here is to go into the conversation with curiosity and the right open-ended question or two. It takes courage and discipline, but you can learn this.
Hopefully, when the relationship is strong enough, you will sense permission to share your experiences with God. Sharing your testimony is really important for you personally and for the other person.
Learn when to listen and learn when to talk.
Your thoughts?
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